at a crossroads

I'm unsure as to why now, when I was feeling pretty good about the path I'm on, I suddenly feel like I've come to a fork in the road. I feel like something needs to change, although I'm not sure what it is. I am overwhelmed by this strange feeling - sometimes it seems like I want to go, just go....somewhere.

There is a sameness to all of it that, right now, is not the kind of sameness one takes comfort in. And in fact, the things I usually take comfort in feel oddly too tight, restrictive in some way I cannot define or understand. It has manifested itself in this tightness in my muscles, this inability to relax, this difficulty just breathing.

I don't want to listen. I don't want to speak. I feel like I've had these coversations before. Even the songs I've heard and smiled about and sang along with (in my head at least) are not comforting. Even the music feels monotone.

I'm not sure what this is. Maybe I do have a slight case of wanderlust. Maybe I'm unconciously homesick. Maybe I need to dance to unfamiliar rhythms. Maybe I need to kiss a stranger.

Maybe I just need to hear some waves.

I think I may have gone too long without recharging my natural rhythm with the sea.